The Dark Side of Cholesterol

Oh, I forgot to tell you guys!  You remember how on Friday Darth Sidious was to see his doctor?  Well, he did and he got quite a shock.  His doctor told him that Darth Sidious had high cholesterol.  This means no sweets, no deluxe burgers from the Dark Side Diner, and no popcorn in the Gloomy Theatre.  This has put Old Sid into a bad mood and now his windows can't be too clean and his bathroom can't be too spotless.  We can't keep him happy.  A lot of our Storm Troopers were smart and suddenly remembered that a lot of vacuuming needed to be done on the opposite side of the death star from Darth Sidious' office.  It's gonna be a long diet...